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I didn't expect it to hurt this much or for this long. I'd left a church before, but somehow this feels different. Perhaps my lack of choice in this decision or the depth of pain play a part, but either way this is much more difficult than I expected. I knew leaving would hurt, that I would miss people, but I also expected my reasons for leaving to overshadow the pain that comes with severed relationships. Perhaps it's because we prolonged the process in our attempt to leave well that the pain still lingers. Perhaps this is just natural over losing a community that was family in so many ways. Maybe it's simply that I had hoped I had enough value to be missed.
Whatever the reason, I still hurt. I can't go back, but I miss my church deeply.
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I am dealing right now with loss of some family relationships and it is very painful. " I knew leaving would hurt, that I would miss people, but I also expected my reasons for leaving to overshadow the pain that comes with severed relationship" - This completely describes how I feel and maybe how my mom feels, too. I am going to send this post to her. Somehow knowing we aren't alone on this journey of loss brings comfort. Praying you find peace through it all.
ReplyDeleteThis is so hard; may God bring you comfort and peace.
ReplyDeleteThank you for visiting my blog and your kind words. This was a difficult prompt for me -- I feel raw and heart sore 12 hours later. I'm so sorry for your loss of church home. I hope you find comfort in a new church soon. <3
ReplyDeleteI have felt this feeling myself when leaving a church. I haven't found comfort yet. I hope you do.
ReplyDeleteI'm feeling your pain and lifting you up. I've been there too.
ReplyDeleteLoss in relationship is so hard... God designed us for relationship and community. I can SO relate to this post and the deep pain in the pulling away. Sending you love and hugs, girl!
ReplyDeleteit is very hard...praying for peace.
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