I think I'm waiting. We've been waiting for awhile, trapped in this in-between state, having left our home church and yet still walking through reconciliation. It's a strange place to be. But the end seems near(I'm not getting my hopes up!), hopefully coming with the spring weather. I'm not getting my hopes up for that either after Sunday's snowstorm. I know I live in Canada, but this is ridiculous!
Until yesterday, I was waiting for a baby. It's a bit odd living on-call, waiting for a baby to make up his mind. I never know what my day will look like, how the next call or text will change my plans. And even once the baby is definitely coming, I don't know what each labour will hold either.
Yesterday summed up this winter well. There was concern at 34 weeks over premature labour, but the baby did not come. Then again later, we thought he was coming. And again. It was more nerve-wracking for the mother than for me. She went past her due-date and yesterday, the OB decided to induce. We thought it would be quick and dirty, hard and fast. But it wasn't. We waited and waited, labouring together for 8 hours. Nothing much had really changed except the pain. Suddenly, her body went into high gear and that baby flew out. It was fast, unexpected and absolutely beautiful. (My nose is pricking, tears welling up as I remember).
Waiting has been hard this year. Sometimes, it has felt like nothing has changed, no matter what we've tried. We've been waiting for reconciliation, restoration, healing. It's been painfully frustrating. Healing has been coming, ever so slowly. But now as I reflect, I wonder if I am on the cusp of seeing this spiritual baby born? Perhaps, much like yesterday's birth, events are about to spring into motion, unfolding in an unexpectedly quick fashion.
As with any labour, I don't know how this will progress and what the outcome will be. But for now, I wait, preparing my heart for whatever will come.
Linking with Imperfect Prose: